Blog Archives - Center for Pastoral Renewal

Being Thankful at Thanksgiving

The holidays are fast approaching! In this blog post we will look at being thankful and grateful in a
season that may be fraught with anxiety, increased workloads, longer hours, higher expectations, and
more time with people. Let’s get into a mood of thankfulness through Scripture: Psalms 107:8-9 states,
“Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind, for he
satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18 states that we are to
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

I am reminded of the song the Carpenters made famous – There’s No Place Like Home for the Holidays.
Do you think of your childhood Thanksgivings? Do you think of family responsibilities? The financial
costs? Time with family members that you may or may not want to spend time with? Society makes a
pointed turn to reminisce about the good old days of being at home with our loved ones. However, our
greatest source of pain, and our greatest source of love, is the family.

The church is expected to fill this role as the family of God. Unfortunately, the church is also a source of
great love and joy – and pain and hurt and sadness. Pastors and church members often have high
expectations about what the church should be or do as God’s family, and disappointment happens when
these expectations are not met.

Consider that Thanksgiving Day and the days prior to Thanksgiving can be stressful. I encourage you to
make a list of the things in life for which you are thankful. Your list may include aspects such as
salvation, parishioners, family members, home, health, work, friends, co-workers, food, etc. What
would add to this list?

Next, consider the causes of anxiousness or disagreements that occurred during past holidays. You
know, the holidays in which we are supposed to be extra thankful? Did you have more parishioners
share their problems during this season than usual? Did you find it hard to say ‘no’ because you felt a
sense of duty to shepherd the individuals in your flock? Pastors who are continually exposed to the
troubles of others may experience compassion fatigue, which can lead to anxiety, lack of purpose,
emotional disconnection, physical symptoms such as headaches and stomachaches, exhaustion, and
difficulties with personal relationships (Psychology Today, 2023) . Additionally, pastors may have
experienced anxiousness when trying to balance work and home expectations. Such past issues may
cause you to feel stressed, anxious, and even unthankful as we head into Thanksgiving.

Now that we have a list of positives (things for which we are thankful) and a list of negatives (past
causes of stress and anxiety), let’s use them to prepare for this year’s Thanksgiving. Below are a few
ways to increase your thankfulness and gratitude, while minimizing past causes of Thanksgiving stress:

 Be aware of compassion fatigue as you listen to the issues and traumas experienced by
parishioners. Over-empathizing can lead to the negative consequences associated with
compassion fatigue.

 Setting expectations with parishioners before the Thanksgiving holiday: “Guest Pastor Bill will be
speaking while I am away with family this Thanksgiving weekend.”

 It’s okay to delegate! Plan for specific individuals to assist you with parishioner requests.

 Repeating Scripture can help you relax. My favorite verse is Philippians 4:4-7 “Rejoice in the
Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do
not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will
guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

 Create a schedule to help with work-life balance. Share this schedule with the people it affects,
such as your spouse.

Of course, the list above is not exhaustive. What would you add to the list to help yourself prepare to be
thankful and grateful, while reducing stress? As we have seen, looking back at past holidays can help us
better prepare this this year’s holidays. However, your past Thanksgiving experiences do not dictate
how this Thanksgiving will turn out. We pray you make this the best Thanksgiving and that you find joy
in all that Thanksgiving has to offer.

References

Psychology Today. (2023). Compassion Fatigue. Retrieved November 8, 2023, from Psychology Today:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/compassion-fatigue

Welcome

This is the first of a long series of blogs about the need for pastors coping with the stress and strains of ministry. Our website is dedicated to providing resources and support for pastors dealing with burnout and vocational strain.

By way of introduction, the Center for Pastoral Renewal (CPR) is the result of many years of fruitful collaboration between Drs. Tom Frederick, Scott Dunbar, and Yvonne Thai due to the providence of the Lord. We are colleagues at a Christian university and have a commitment to using our academic skills to support the church and her shepherds.

Tom Frederick (PhD, Fuller Theological Seminary) is a tenured professor of psychology with over ten years of teaching experience in both online and in-person settings. Dr. Frederick has been published in a variety of journals. In the fall of 2021, Tom joined Drs. Jack and Judith Balswick for the 5th revision of their classic text, The Family: A Christian Perspective on the Contemporary Home. Tom has coauthored with Scott, A Christian Approach to Work and Family Burnout: Calling, Caring, and Connecting, which integrates Christian theological principles with cutting edge I-O Psych research on burnout.

Scott Dunbar (DBA, Liberty University) has been teaching in higher education since 2013 and worked in the business industry prior. He is a tenured associate professor, and administered master and doctoral level degree programs. Dr. Dunbar has been published in a variety of academic journals and his research revolves around the topics of burnout, work-family balance, differentiation in Christ, and work-family conflict. His publications are largely interdisciplinary and are often categorized in the realm of Industrial-Organizational Psychology. Dr. Dunbar, along with Dr. Frederick, published the book Calling, Caring and Connecting: A Christian Approach to Burnout Caused by Work and Family Conflict in 2019. Dr. Dunbar continues to publish original research and books on the topic of burnout related to higher education, pastors, and the concrete industry.

Yvonne Thai (PhD, UC Riverside) is a tenured professor of sociology with over fifteen years pf teaching experience in higher education. Dr. Thai served as department chair for behavioral sciences, program coordinator for sociology, and is a curriculum developer, specializing in undergraduate and graduate online and distance learning. Her current research focuses on emotional labor among service workers, particularly those in the helping professions. Together with Drs. Frederick and Dunbar, she has coauthored numerous works on the topic of pastoral burnout. She also serves on the editorial review team for MDPI Social Sciences and other behavioral science journals.

Our collaboration on understanding the unique experiences of pastoral burnout and the intent to provide practical resources for addressing it culminated in the the development of the CPR. The purpose of the Center for Pastoral Renewal is:

to provide spiritual and psychological resources to reduce stress and burnout experienced by Christian pastors and leaders. These spiritual and psychological resources aim to reduce pastors’ and leaders’ stress and burnout, while supporting pastors’ and leaders’ self-care, care-giving, and personal growth.

Our desire to focus on the individual, family, and congregational dimensions of pastoral burnout. In providing resources, grounded in the Christian faith and spiritual tradition, pastors will discern the signs and symptoms of burnout along with contextual factors that contribute to and are resources against burnout.

It is our prayer that the Lord will bless you through the ministry of the CPR.

Being Thankful at Thanksgiving

Welcome

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