Previously we looked at coping with pastoral stress and burnout through The Jesus Prayer. The Jesus
Prayer, coupled with the intentional breathing patterns, allows us to cope with stress and burnout in the
moment. Another way to battle stress and burnout in the moment is through a different type of prayer.
The type of prayer focused on in this blog is prayer for others. This is a change in mindset as we typically
pray for ourselves, our issues, our specific situation, etc. when we feel stressed-out. In other words, we
call out to God to help us in our circumstances. There is nothing wrong with praying for ourselves. Let’s
change direction from ourselves for a moment: How can praying for others when you are feeling
stressed-out help you cope in the moment?

Praying for others we know has proven mental and physical positives outcomes. People that pray for
one another, especially in exclusive romantic relationships, expressed increases in commitment and
relationship satisfaction. That is the power of prayer indeed. In other words, couples that pray for one
another stay together! (Fincham, et al., 2014). The benefits of prayer are also focused on medical
challenges. Individuals with HIV who prayed for those they knew were twice as likely to survive over 17
years when compared to those who did not pray for known others (Ironson & Shaheen, 2022).
Praying for others can offset the effects of life trauma (Krause, 2016).

Individuals praying for others experience positive mental, physical, and relational outcomes. Such
positive outcomes relate to battling the negative mental consequences of burnout (anxiety, loss of
hope, distress, etc.), the physical consequences of burnout (headaches, illness, loss of energy etc.), and
the relational consequences of burnout (i.e. cynicism, distancing oneself from others, resentment, etc.).
As such, praying for others has positive benefits for the person praying.

Changing our direction and intent of prayer from a self-focus to an others-focus can help us mitigate
burnout in the moment. Why does this work? When we focus on our dire circumstances, our feelings,
our obstacles, our problems, our stress, etc. all we can see are the negatives pushing in on us. Praying
for others we know removes our mind from focusing on our issues to focusing on others. After praying
for others, which causes us to break from being self-focused, we may find clarity and mental/physical
capacity; we may realize others are experiencing worse situations than we are; we may remind
ourselves that God is in control.

How would one use praying for others as a means of coping with burnout in the moment? When you
feel stress taking a hold on you, take 2-5-minute prayer break. After finding a quiet place, consciously
pray for other individuals in your life. It may help to keep a prayer list. The prayers should be specific in
nature: “Lord, please calm Bill’s nerves as he flies up North today. I know he is scared to fly. Please
surround him with the peace only you can bring.” Another example: “I want to pray Your blessing over
Sally today. Thank you for giving her to me as wife. May she feel your presence throughout the day, and
give her patience while homeschooling our kids.”

In these examples, we remove our self-focus and replace it with an others-focus. This removes us, for
the time we praying, from our stressors. We emerge from praying for others with a greater sense of
peace and refined clarity as we complete our tasks.

References

Fincham, F. D., Beach, S. R., Fincham, F. D., & Beach, S. R. (2014). I say a little prayer for you: Praying for partner increases commitment in romantic relationships. Journal of Family Psychology, 28(5),
587-593. doi:10.1037/a0034999

Ironson, G., & Ahmad, S. S. (2022). Praying for people you know predicts survival over 17 years among
people living with HIV in the U.S. Journal of Religion and Health, 61(5), 4081-4095.
doi:10.1007/s10943-022-01622-5

Krause, N., Ironson, G., & Pargament, K. (2016). Lifetime trauma, praying for others, and C-reactive
protein. Biodemography and Social Biology, 62(3), 249-261.
doi:10.1080/19485565.2016.1188367